I Hear Mom in My Voice

Remember being a teenager ? Did you feel like all the adults didn’t understand you and that life seemed so hard.

I remember thinking my mom knew nothing about being a mom and compared her to other moms who would let my friends do whatever they wanted.

I would get so upset because I felt she was overprotective and thought I was easily influenced.

Well growing up and becoming a mother of three has helped me to understand my mother more than ever.

The way I worry about everyone around the kids and whether their intention is to hurt because of all the sad things we see in media. It’s like you don’t know everyone deep secrets. How are we to know ?

I hold their hands to cross the street and have a panic attack if they are behind me and not in front of me.

My mom, the way she tries to protect me from a baby till now is inspirational. The sacrifices she made I found myself making similar ones.

Is it genetics or is it just how I was raised ? In pictures we are often described as looking twins. ( she loved taking pictures in her 20s, just like me)

Do you hear your parents when speaking from your mouth to your kids?

Puja: experiencing a peaceful environment for a Ritual Report

Life Begins When We Stop Living for the Approval of Others — Chateau Cherie

Sadly, many targets of bullying seek approval from others, but what’s really bad is that the people they seek approval, validation, and acceptance from are mostly people who absolutely could care less about them. What’s even worse is that many of those targets seek approval from are their bullies- people who have absolutely zero respect…

Life Begins When We Stop Living for the Approval of Others — Chateau Cherie

9 Psychological Tricks to Help You Save More Money

Do you ever wonder why you spend your money the way you do? Why do you feel the need to get immediate gratification and end up using all your savings…

9 Psychological Tricks to Help You Save More Money

Counseling Could Save a Elementary Student Future Coping Skills

Since the commencement of the school year, have you noticed that your five or six years old has acquired a new type of attitude? I know I did. It took about five months for me to recognize that she was undergoing something traumatic at school. I could not fathom why she kept speaking back to me when I would ask her to put away her play make-up kit. The fact that she grew belligerent towards her siblings appalled me. I kept querying what was on this girl’s mind and what has transformed her. She needed to get something off her chest. Her afflictions needed to be shared and once her struggles of being physically bullied were shared with me, she progressively lost her temper. My brilliant daughters’ problematic attitude began to be maintained as she was able to receive counseling on how to control hurt and emotional distress. Counseling could serve the way a child process and positively handles their emotions as an adult, whether a child is the bully or receiving the harassment. 

The case of bullying or harassment is, unfortunately, a well-known issue that every school goes through. Since the 1970s, research have been conducted to determine the benefits of involvement of counseling for students by The Norwegian researcher Olweus. In a scholarly publication article “Developing a Cognitive Behavioral Intervention Program to Reduce Bully Tendencies in Primary School Children and the Program Effectiveness”, Fusun Gokkaya and Serap Tekinsav Sutcu interpret bullying as a distinct person or crowd producing agony on another student negatively. (Fusun and Sutcu, 2018) Victims of relentless bullying can influence a student to be scared about attending school. 

During the five months, my frightened child implored me not to attend school and would dispute about getting dressed every morning. A student may undergo sadness and possess low self-esteem issues due to cruelness. Some students lose confidence in everyone especially if the harasser is menacing. Since my primary time being bullied was in sixth grade, I appraised that was the average time frame bullying starts. 

After learning my six years old lady had been bullied since she started kindergarten, I looked more into the subject. What exactly did my Lana’s experience being the victim? She experienced mental and physical abuse from a fellow student. A student she assured me was her buddy, who caused me to believe that she was getting along with others. 

My daughter is a bashful, caring and compassionate person. She’s also quite skilled at math and I’ve seen her easily make friends who request to have playdates. I never once thought someone would want to injure her the way she was harm. Around November 2019, my daughter mentioned to me that her friend kept clasping her arm too hard and that it hurt. I discoursed to her classroom teacher that she sees every school day and mentioned that the girl might be a little rough on grasping Lana’s arm, and the teacher appeared shocked. She said she will keep an eye out to make sure she isn’t too rough. 

Lana and I seemed comforted that her “friend” would be more delicate from now on. Three months later, However, she struggled with controlling her emotions and constantly seemed violent with her more adolescent brother and sister. She even became rebellious when I told her she was not allowed to use scissors to clip her hair. The day she did that I noticed she had some new unusual bangs, and knew she disobeyed me again. I move the new set of unsymmetrical bangs around her forehead noticing an open wound and discoloration on her skin. “Baby girl! what happened to your head?”, I worriedly asked. Sometimes Lana forgets that I know her well and when she does not establish eye contact and twirls her hair, I know she’s giving me false information. I requested her to look me in the eyes this time and repeat the question assuring her that I am her mother and her best friend. She finally gave me eye connection and said “okay…”. Lana continued, “On our way to school, the same girl pushed my head against the window a little hard.” A little hard? I thought sneeringly. While I understood why the teacher who was driving likely had her attention towards the road, I could not help but question why she did not notice the mark on my daughters’ head. I asked where the teachers during these moments were. She explained that the teachers seldom pay attention and on top of that her tormentor also threatens to harm her more if she does tell the teachers and parents. I asked some more questions about the girl because I want to know every aspect before I bring this up to the supervisor instead of the teacher. I ask how long this has been going on and the response was since school started. My heart utterly shattered at the fact that my angel has been dealing with such trauma and presumed that she had no one to tell. One ultimate question that I was scared to ask, “What ways has she hurt you?”. Besides the other two occurrences mentioned before, the troubled bully would steal things from my daughter’s backpack, bend her fingers backward, follow her, and constantly call her a variation of names. Unfortunately, my kindergartener isn’t the only one. Statistics show that in sampling and selection procedures confirm that one-two kindergarteners of twelve total experiences exclusion from play and those adults don’t notice (Helgeland and Lund, 2017). I believe the mind of the bully should be intervened with counseling. After my daughter mention all the harsh treatments she had received, I began to wonder what the girl is who was bullying her going through at home. Is this girl going through some sort of abuse at home? I compromise and know I cannot be irate at this girl for the way she had treated my girl. When I spoke to the director, I was told that they would be contacting the parents and assured me that it won’t happen again. If it were to happen again, they would pretty much kick the student out. I believe it doesn’t have to get to that extent if the bully could talk about her emotions to a counselor and receive adequate ways to handle her stress at home instead of taking it out on my daughter and other students. By handling this now it could benefit this girl’s future and help her with social health needed to have a healthy mindset. In 1993, Olweus developed a set of rules to prevent bullying. The first rule proposed is “we will not bully other students”. The second rule is that the teachers will attempt to help students who are victims of bullying and the final rule of Olweus proposal is that teachers must make sure to include students who feel more isolated than others. (Smith, pg. 62) While I’m glad that Olweus understands how crucial it is that victims now it’s not their fault, I feel the young bullies need to be focused on as well to help prevent the victims from being bullied in the first place. Coincidentally, after my six-year-old Lana had told me about all the harassment she had suffered during the prior five months, her attitude had drastically changed towards me and other people. The truth is that I guessed she gained an attitude due to the new adaption of attending kindergarten. Mental health counselors help by providing direction on how to manage emotional circumstances by listening to an individual’s internal perceptions. Variations in her behavior after she had confessed to me what truly occurred to her forehead now has me recognizing that counseling would benefit her emotionally. Containing elements such as oppression could provoke a blast of fury. What if she had kept this all in for another year or so?

Work Cited 

Gökkaya, Füsun, and Serap T. Sütcü. “Developing A Cognitive Behavioral Intervention Program to Reduce Bully Tendencies in Primary School Children and the Program Effectiveness.” Egitim Ve Bilim, vol. 43, no. 193, 2018. ProQuest, http:// search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/2015727406?accountid=11302. 

Helgeland, Anne, and Ingrid Lund. “Children’s Voices on Bullying in Kindergarten.” Early Childhood Education Journal, vol. 45, no. 1, 2017, pp. 133-141. ProQuest, http:// search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/1855687091?accountid=11302, doi:http:// dx.doi.org.ezproxy.hacc.edu/10.1007/s10643-016-0784-z.

Pepler, Debra J., et al. Bullying in Schools: How Successful Can Interventions Be? Cambridge Univ. Press, 2007.

Propitious Multimedia

Ding! An email app has sent an alert notifying that the monthly bank statement previously sent through mail is ready. Thereafter, an alert from a HACC “Brightspace” page has sent out notifications that a quiz on Math 055 received a 100 percent and that the final grade is a 98.86 percent as of that moment. Another notification of a new DNA match on MyHeritage.com has been discovered! All these alerts bring great impact to not just the iGens, but also the millennials and so forth by keeping the environment intact and providing nature with their children who are one of earth’s main source of oxygen. The media has helped many self-driven students with their academic intelligence using many types of resources that came from the worldwide web. In moderation, media has influence communications between families and friends who were considered distant. Steven Pinker would concur, that even though “mass media” can have detrimental impacts from a lack of self-control, the results may impact favorably.

            One, situation diverts from individuals who argue that using tree-sacrificing papers helps maintain organized documents or kept proof of documentations safe in case accusations of unpaid rent from ten years ago appear. But as benefits suggest that number one; papers are deleterious for the trees. The trees are such a tremendous part of humans’ survival, such that lawyers in California and Florida suggest that more than half of documents should be used with recycled papers. (DeBendictis) Second, there are other methods to help crucial document safety. Keep a separate hard drive disk to obtain important files on. Even Chase Banks Co. understands the value by offering new customers a promotion of five-dollar credit to those who sign up for paperless. Media and new technology have come a long way, from receiving thousands of documents from the mail to now receiving the same important documents on email. Nancy McCormack research suggests, “The use of paper of all kinds, such as office paper, cardboard, toilet paper rolls, etc., — eid fall by one percent a year on average since 2000”. Media has served the interest of lachrymose trees who may have been fully extinct like cavemen.

            An additional quarrel of the matter, media has impacted a good amount of iGens souls to be eaten into the dark world of Twitter. Moreover, media has impacted the brain of students to succeed and understand the information they study. For instance, there are applications on smartphone devices, such as quizlet.com helping scholars’ study for important tests with flashcards and other studying methods. There is HACC’s library website providing students with an online database for important research essays. As a result, success has been achieved by the “Bright-space” page that offers alerts to students with grade status and upcoming due dates to keep organized. As Abdulla Jaafar Desmal observed, “About 39 percent of students either agreed or strongly agreed that social media sites enhanced their research skill” (9). If these students believe it helps them, who are we to be in the way of success.

            Mass communication has availed the social interactions of families and friends. An example, friends in their forties who had not seen each other before the legal age of becoming an adult. Distant families that live two states apart but previously hung out with each other every other weekend. Another example, sites like MyHeritage.com has helped lost individuals find family members unheard of and match segments of the DNA. As emphasizes by others, “The e-communication helps those who are scared to talk about certain things that make them uncomfortable in a physical environment” (Chadorchi, 22). There are chat blogs online for mothers who feel postpartum and do not know how to talk to their significant others about it. Even though communications of judgment can cause arguments, other mothers share the same concerns. Especially on days below zero degrees, the communication of media benefits those who need social interaction because they are just too comfortable sitting inside the warm living room or are simply bored with loneliness.   

            In brief, how can mass media only be harmful given the benefits previously mentioned? Could not media be beneficial to nature’s life that has been destroyed by the ones’ who need it? Could multimedia help a student who does not have assistance with understanding science homework? As mentioned, “Successfully, the online network and tech-savvy gadgets are helping the public find judicious ways to learn with resources such as e-books and online encyclopedias” (Pinker). Lastly, is not it possible that a simple altercation between a friendship could be resolved through writing it out instead of yelling it out? Media benefits people in many ways, it does not mean you have to stay glued to it but that you can use it when you believe the time is right.

                                                                   Work Cited

Abdulla, Jaafar Desmal. “The Impact of Using Social Media and Internet On Academic Performance Case Study Bahrain Universities.” EAI Endorsed Transactions on Scalable Information Systems, vol 4, Iss. 13, Jun 2017, pp. 9. ProQuest, http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/2306287562?accountid=11302

Chardorchi, David. “Possitve Effects of Electronic Communication On Interpersonal Relationships.” ProQuest Dissertations and Theses, 2016, pp. 22, ProQuest, http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/1800541403?accountid=11302

DeBenedictis, Don J. “Saving Trees, Reducing Waste.” ABA Journal, vol. 78, 10, 1992, pp. 26. ProQuest, http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/194348699?accountid=11302.

McCormack, Nancy. “Mission Impossible? the Future of “Paperless” Library Operations.” Library Management, vol. 32, no. 4, 2011, pp. 279-289. ProQuest, http://search.proquest.com.ezproxy.hacc.edu/docview/868253247?accountid=11302, doi:http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.hacc.edu/10.1108/01435121111132284.

Pinker, Steven. “Mind Over Mass Media.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 10 June 2010, http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/11/opinion/11Pinker.html.

A new song i like

No paradise in the Presence of Dereliction

Imaginative writer Ursula Le Guin introduces her short story “The Ones Who Walked Away from Omelas” with a utopian setting of what Omelas’s City is like during the jubilant Festival of Summer. The Festival of Summer is supposed to be a celebration of life and not a celebration for the death of enemies. The author then goes into explaining why the Omelas residents are happy by saying, “Happiness is based on a just discrimination of what is necessary, what is neither necessary nor destructive, what is destructive”. Living in a world where discrimination occurs to homeless and neglected children is constantly ignored and believing it causes contentment is not a righteous place.

The author advises that people of Omelas are not your common mortal, they are ecstatic and less complicated than the successes of our society. The Omelas maintain merry lives even when they perceive a neighbor’s juvenile suffering. Following the festival, a parade of fortunate happy characters passes by the city where kinds of impoverished inhabitants and children reside. They appear to be evident in the eyes of fortunate citizens of Omelas, but no mind is paying attention. The gloomy resonance of the children’s flutes is becoming a familiar sound that fades in their heads. The author explains that Omelas confines a child in a building within the municipality. The child bellows for help from anyone but no one apprehends the child.

The child’s outcries become distant and fade to the residents of Omelas who unfortunately depend on this torture to be contented.

The adults of Omelas inform their children about maltreatment given to homeless children in their town and their children discover a feeling of guilt without knowing the meaning of culpability. A few residents desire for relief of the homeless children, but first aims for the cheerfulness of one’s flesh and bones. The City of Omelas uses this method as a critical rule of pure glee. The children of the fortunate ones can’t seem to comprehend the horrid mystery, but what can they do? They are simply children who are doing as they are taught. Eventually, the misery of the vagrants becoming a ritual to the children of the lucky families with shelter and freedom. The blessed children grow to become their parents’ and don’t seem to understand why the feeling of vexation is occurring towards what their ethics consider valueless. Deep down they feel pity wanting to help the other children of a saddening existence. They don’t even know what guilt means, yet feel their morals arriving. Some of the children in the narrative departure from the happiness Omelas has to offer and never return to the felicitous side of paradise.

Meanwhile, the less fortunate ones of Omelas City try to understand and accept that there’s not much they can do about it. They accept that the expression of freedom is not legitimate in their community. The penurious people have the knowledge and a beating heart like the successors of their city, but no one seems to notice or care to give them a chance of happiness.

Now, I understand where Ursula Le Guin’s views made sense in her story. The author briefly is describing that Omelas City is just like the regular people of North America. There are the fortunate ones with good jobs and money. Financial stability does cause less stress and can better someone’s happiness. I remember many times where I was sad because I couldn’t get my daughter a toy, she wanted due to a lack of my finances. The American people do as the Omelas citizens do, which is passed by a shelter less soul in their cars and roll up their windows hoping a homeless person doesn’t ask for a quarter that is meant for a carwash. We pass and ignore the homeless sitting against buildings or sleeping on a bench in NYC, I’ve witnessed it from a large continuous crowd that never ends. Like the Omelas Festival of summer, we have Fourth of July and don’t even offer extra hotdogs forgotten on the grill from being too drunk on booze (which sounds similar to Omelas drooz). I agree that even we as parents and teachers educate children by saying phrases “there are children who don’t have any Christmas presents”. The children of our world don’t understand, especially the younger ones. How could they? Finally, after re-reading Omelas’ tale a few times I comprehended what she meant by the people who leave never come back. When she states something, she believed was more incredible about the happiness of Omelas responding, “These people go out into the streets, and walk down the street alone,” I realized that the final statement of her story is another unfortunate problem today in our states. Some teenagers run away from home because no one listens or pays attention. Even adults can drift away to a roofless life when alcohol and depression controlled their mind separating happiness of family and stability of their lives.

I understand that more children are becoming homeless or lost in both Omelas and our world. If you see a child that looks lost, don’t ignore them. You could prevent them from becoming another child without a warm place to stay during the wet snowy days. Donate clothes that do not fit you or your kids to those in need. Make Omelas a happy place for all and not just for one type of class. Call the police station or ask the child if they are lost. Don’t ignore a suspicious van following children from school they could take them out of Omelas where they will never come back. Communicate to your troubled child so that you can deter them from running away and entering the foreboding side the streets have to offer. If children, teens, adults are not doing anything to limit discrimination and unsheltered people of any sort, then conceivably Omelas is not my wonderland. But, if Omelas could try to make the ones who suffer more content than it could be an equitable utopia.

Work Cited

Guin, Ursula Le. “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas.” The Wind’s Twelve Quarters: Short Stories, sites.asiasociety.org/asia21summit/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/3.-Le-Guin-Ursula-The- Ones-Who-Walk-Away-From-Omelas.pdf.

My Reflections on Writing

Have you ever thought that writing could be encouraging and help you feel confident and relieved for a moment? Writing has always been very beneficial in my life in many ways. Writing helps me feel organized, proud, and even makes me feel better on days when I am at my lowest. I can’t say that I have ever had a negative outcome from writing. Many kinds of experiences in my life have helped me feel positive towards writing and has helped me enjoy writing.

My First positive experience of writing is that I feel organized. I feel it as I jot down tasks and reminders in my planner book every day. I feel it as I write the titles on my tab dividers to help keep from my class notes from mixing up. Even before I wrote my essay assignment that I am writing at this moment, I had used prewriting techniques to keep me, and my topics organized.

Another kind of positive experience from writing has made me feel proud of myself for receiving a good grade on an essay in Philosophy. I always have anxiety about handing in essays. My mind starts asking 21 questions over and over until I get that grade. My mind keeps on repeating, constantly, asking; “did I fail?”; “did the teacher hate it?”; or “did I write too much?”. Not only was this professor known for being a tough critique of essays, but this was also my first semester in college, after taking a break for over ten years. This essay was the last assignment that would reveal the final grade in this class. When the last day of that class had appeared, I sat at my desk anticipating that my results were doomed. When my name was called, my heart stopped for a second. I became shocked that the professor was telling me; “you did a very good job, Catherine!”. Then I saw my paper and looked at the grade. At that time and moment, I felt very proud of myself.

I’m pretty sure we all have our days where we can’t keep our emotions intact, whether it be angry, sad, happy, lonely, nervous, etc. Dealing with those types of emotions can be difficult. When I was going through one or all those types of emotions, it was hard for me to calm down and think about those emotions I am feeling. I remember once upon a time in high school I was struggling with emotional difficulties in my life, so I had met with my guidance counselor. I remember her suggesting me to write in a journal when I needed to let some emotions out. Ever since then I am always writing in my journal whenever I’m going through a troubling time or just need a way to let my overpowering emotions leave me. I think the whole journal writing experience is amazing because I can express my words into paper, leave them there and free my head from the overwhelming thoughts. Writing in my journal always helps me feel better.

In drawing things to a close, writing has helped me in many experiences in my life. It has made me feel calm. Writing has helped me feel proud of myself when I thought I wasn’t able to write an interesting essay, and writing has made me feel organized about my life and achieve my goals. Only good has ever come out of writing in all my experiences and my feelings towards writing are positive.

me writing
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